Thoughts on a deteriorating society

Thoughts on a deteriorating society:
Where are our leaders, our speakers, our stewards?

The dedicated shepherds of spiritual faith, the entrusted governors of public policy, the voice of the people are all lost to me.

The shepherds have flocked to churches; biased and closed within the ancient texts, rewritten in the hands of mortal men to mask personal gains behind redefined spiritual ethics. And as a result the shepherds lose trust and tarnish faith, demonstrate hypocrisy, and break the spirit of the flock.

Our governors are blinded by the need to be correct with everyone, and accept support in back pockets to influence policy decisions; a process that uplifts the inept and spineless into positions of power, as puppets of others. And as a result provide the people with no vision, no backbone, and no leadership.

The voices of the people are lost in the resounding flood of information that inundates our daily lives. Radio, Newspaper, and Television media used to provide perspectives from a solitary point of view outlining the facts presented by the evidence of investigative effort. The media is now including the voice of the untrained and uneducated because everyone now has equal access to voice their opinions. The art of investigation is lost on the media. Facts are now blurred by bias and public influence. Through social media and networking, everyone gets an equal say, everyone takes advantage of the opportunity, and nobody stands out. Nobody rises above the voices, above the sea of comments, tweets, and grams.

Without leadership and vision, everyone loses.

Deep down I know our society can be more. We can put a man on the moon and destroy atoms. We have the capacity to cure cancer, feed the hungry, and house the homeless. We can educate our children, keep them healthy, and improve the quality of life for everyone without imposing on the rights and way of life of our society.

We can restore faith with compassion and kindness without dictating or judging others for what they do with their love. We can support each other through acceptance and tolerance.

Where are our leaders, our speakers, our stewards?

Winter 2011 Highlights

March 4, 2011

Wait. . . What the hell? It is March now? Where have I been? What in the world has happened in the last three months that would cause me to stop writing? Friday’s are typically slow around here, and the morning break should allow me the time to write. I reorganized the files for this blog, but that can’t be the issue. Weird. Well, today is significant for this blog, and I will get to that in a minute, but first let’s recap the beginning of 2011. . .

I don’t remember New Years. I don’t think we did anything special? Stayed up to our usual midnight schedule, watched the ball drop and go to bed. Whoopie.

We DID take Natalie to her first Hockey game, and it was awesome! She watched the Stockton Thunder play in their annual Teddy Bear Toss game. She even donated some of her newer stuffies. A big thank you to Uncle Jason for snagging super seats in the club section so that we didn’t have to fight the crowd with the baby girl. It made it a lot easier to navigate things. She was such a trooper. Natalie sat in my lap for most of the game, and only freaked out when the home team scored, because everyone in the arena cheered, and the sirens go off, and the music is loud, and the whole atmosphere changes without any warning. That was difficult to manage for her age, and I did my best to cover her ears and hold her tight so that she knew it was ok. Although she did well, I think we will only take her once a year until she is more comfortable. I was so proud of her. She actually watched the game. It was so cool.

I went to Virginia for a week in February for work, and I brought home a cold off of the return flight. I was sitting next to this lady, knowing that she didn’t feel well, actually feeling the virus get into my system and spread. It was horrible. I spent the next four days in bed, then Jakki did the same, and Natalie was not feeling well either. We started feeling better at the end of the month when something amazing happened . . .

It was Presidents Day. Not a typical Monday at all, as we were relaxing, watching movies, and grazing and playing throughout the day. Natalie was “couch cruising” all morning, and we started to walk with her by holding her hands and dancing around the house. Then it happened, she just started walking to us. It was great! We knew that our days of security were over, but we were also excited that she is developing and growing. We now have a full fledged toddler on our hands, walking from one side of the house to the other.

That was very important because just the week before we had Natalie’s 15 month checkup, and the pediatrician refused to write us off of the watch list for Natalie’s development. He is still concerned with her size, and he insisted that we continue with the follow up meeting with the Pediatric Autism Specialist in Vacaville. Which brings me to today. . .

Natalie has her follow up appointment with the Doctors in Vacaville, and Jakki is really nervous about it. I focus on what Natalie can do, as of today she knows at about 15 words (dada, mama, baby, cat, dog, ball, bubble, head, eye, bye bye, hi, cow) everything has been cow lately though. She points to something and goes “Cow??” and we say, “no, that is a horse”, and she responds “COW!”. She is too cute for her own good. She also knows three signs (food, more, and milk) , although she confuses them sometimes. She always wants more puffs. She is walking regularly, and likes to dismantle things. I think she is fine, and we don’t need the doctors to depend on our family for their job security.

The only major development that I would like to see now is teeth. I am ready to just feed her off of our plate, but we are dependent on baby food until she gets teeth. I know that some people get teeth late, I may have been one of them actually, but it is starting to worry me a little. However this is not relative to her cognitive skills, and I do hope that she does well for the doctors and their tests today. I just wish I could be there instead of here at work. That’s a whole different story, but the best place for me for my family is at work today. It sucks, but that’s the way it goes sometimes. Here’s to a happy and positive Friday!

~ Nathan

p.s. For those following the previous Dora complaint, I let it go, and it did eventually die off. I think that the blog led to a small intervention, for everyone. I am learning to let things go too. . .

The Speaker

I feel the urge to demonstrate greatness
But I am held back by the constraints of my position
The need to maintain status quo in order to feed my family
To clothe my baby
Shelter my loved ones

I want to do something better
To challenge my life, make a difference
A catalyst of change for the people as a whole
To improve society
Induce positivity

The negative image imposed by media
Results in the separation of compassion and reality
The people need to return to empathy
To exchange faith
With humble interaction

Inspired by the intent of others
The eloquence of King is an art form
The logic of Jefferson, simplicity of Lincoln
To be the speaker
For our house

This generation is without a speaker
Voices lost in the vastness of the internet
Enshrouded and clouded by the media
To be a voice of reason
And logic

We need a voice to present our need for social justice
A need for educational freedom
Entertaining our rights to speech and change
To refocus our nation
Inward

Americans have the capacity for greatness
But we spread ourselves too thin
It is our responsibility to demonstrate the best in humanity
We cannot do this without taking care of ourselves
To prioritize our needs
Before seeking justice for others

America will not maintain prominence with the status quo
Wisdom and justice come with education
Love and compassion come with reflection
To present greatness
For everyone

Nathaniel Atherstone

Feeding into the corporate monster

December 4, 2010

Well, somehow I missed the month of November. There were a few contributing factors that led to this delayed blog entry, including but not limited to; Natalie’s 1st Birthday, my new computer at work, and the never ending cold that was passed around the house for the greater part of the month. But now, I can say that we are all healthy, and I am able to start writing during my morning break at work. This new computer is pretty nice compared to the turtle slow laptop that I was using before.

Anyway, this blog is a logged complaint that has been building for the last month. It all started with Natalie’s birthday. A simple affair with close friends and family, originally intended to be inexpensive and easy. Jakki and I decided to hold a Dutch lunch at a local restaurant because our house is fairly small and not able to hold a party of more than 6 people (not to mention kids). So we did our research and decided on one of our favorite Italian restaurants. There was no room fee, and they were very accommodating, so the location worked out well. Jakki brought special cupcakes, and we were planning on a couple of balloons. Then it happened. In one fell swoop, everything, and I mean everything turned into a Dora fest.

If you don’t know who Dora is, then you are probably not in close proximity to a toddler or child under the age of 5. Dora the Explorer is a loud and obnoxious Hispanic girl that has a big heart. She travels with her monkey to help people in need and while she does it she collects stars and avoids obstacles. It is a great show for little ones as the music is catchy, they focus on bilingual education, and there is a lot of repetition. Don’t get me wrong, I think Dora is way better than some of the previous obnoxious television characters for kids. So based on that premise, Dora is ok.

However, Natalie is now 12 months old. Natalie likes the Dora songs, and recognizes her and smiles. Natalie recognizes many things and smiles though, she is 12 months old, new stuff to look at is fun. But her grandma thinks that Natalie LOVES Dora. This has led to a flood of Dora in our house. Starting with her birthday, at least six Dora balloons, Dora napkins, Dora plates, Dora party favors, Dora table covers. Grandma spent at least $100 on Dora stuff. Mind you, the restaurant had napkins, plates, and table covers, so many of these things are now in the house.

I didn’t say anything at the time because: a. I was more focused on Natalie, and I didn’t care if grandma was spending the money on our girl, and b. parties are supposed to have themes, so why not? It seemed reasonable. However, the Dora explosion has not stopped. Grandma has kindly bought a Dora pillow, Dora dolls, Dora books (one that plays music, which is really cool), and she comes over daily (yes DAILY) with something Dora for Natalie. This is two weeks running. There are Dora pajamas with her body painted all over the front, there are sweaters, and shirts, and Dora plates and cups, and washcloths, and Christmas ornaments. I think you may now get the picture. Our living room has more Dora faces than anything in comparison.

Now on to the issue; last night grandma came over once again with more Dora clothes. As I was catching up with my Fantasy Hockey league, I look up as she holds up a sweater and asks, “Isn’t this cute?” It wasn’t. It was a god awful ugly pink sweater with “Dora the Explorer” written all over it (literally all over it) in a color of diagonal rainbow Arial text with a picture of Dora on the front. I think it is horrible. But I instinctively (and without really thinking about it) said “not really”. I didn’t say anything worse, I just continued to play on my laptop.

So guess who is now the ungrateful husband/father. I mean really, REALLY? Jakki’s parents come over every day to see Natalie. EVERY DAY. Imagine seeing your parents EVERY DAY. Now add on the fact that they are your landlord, and you have cheap rent. Sweat equity and a few hundred dollars every month makes life easier than most, and as a result Jakki can stay at home with Natalie which is a blessing. It is a blessing. But this additional cost is taxing. The daily visit is typically manageable, however Jakki and I have to schedule every evening around it. Now grandma is dropping a hundred a week on Dora merchandise for Natalie and expecting a round of applause for it every night. Or, at least, our general approval (smiles and happiness). And if I happen to think it is CRAZY, I am ungrateful.

Let’s get to that hundred a week (that is a fair guess). I wouldn’t mind so much except for the fact that grandma likes to give Jakki stress about how broke they are and that they can’t afford to do things like buy hay for the horses, or fix the fencing. I can think of a lot of things to do with that money around the property. Even an additional hundred a month for Natalie’s college fund (or Jakki’s for that matter) would be awesome. But Dora makes Natalie happy!

Let’s get back to Dora. Jakki said to me, (paraphrasing) “This is just the beginning. Natalie will attach to many things as she grows up and we will have to deal with it.” If Natalie was asking for Dora, that would be fine, but she isn’t. This flood is based on an assumption that Natalie is gaga over Dora. It is true, when the Dora song comes on the TV, she smiles and watches, but as soon as the show continues she starts playing with other things. It could be a Ferrari, and if she liked seeing the red flash across the screen with the tune of a turbo injected eight cylinder engine revving up as it goes by would she then get a whole bunch of Ferrari stuff? Dora is age appropriate and relatively available, so grandma is clinging onto it.

I want to take advantage of the opportunity to present diversity to Natalie before she gets hooked on things. Give her various things, toys, music, animals, mix it up. Then let’s see what she wants and plays with regularly. We are feeding into the corporate monster and brainwash branding of our child before she even has a chance. Let her decide what she wants and let us know herself. Then we will have the opportunity to say “no” when it gets to be too much.

I didn’t get everything I wanted as a child. I didn’t have a dozen Transformers and Star Wars action figures. I had enough, but I was never afforded the floodgate of goods as a child. And I understand why. I don’t want Natalie to get everything she ever wants handed down to her. I want her to want to earn it later down the line.

I am not ungrateful. And I understand that Jakki's parents love Natalie and want to do everything for her. I just think it is going overboard way too soon. And if I say anything, people get hurt and I am the bad guy.

So, lots of issues this week. Thankfully nothing about Natalie and her health this fall. She is doing great. She was a little sick, but she got through it fine, and she is a happy little bug, and overall I think Jakki and I are too.

~ Nathan

p.s. On the way in to work today, I was behind a car with a license plate frame that read, “Did mommy say no? Call 1-(800)-Grandma”. Too true.

p.p.s. It's Jakki's birthday this weekend, so Happy Birthday love! I know you try hard to be the best mother and wife, and I appreciate everything you do for us.

Cutest Dragon Ever!

October 29, 2010

The cutefest continues. I wonder if Natalie is in her prime, and she will be a homely monster when she is a teenager? I don’t think I can handle the potential attention she may get when she is older, it is tough enough having her stop traffic as it is today. She literally stops people in their tracks. We may be in trouble.

Yesterday was the RTD Fall Festival, an annual fun afternoon where all of the employee’s bring their kids into the office and we have a small Halloween party. There is candy and cupcakes (thank you Jakki) and popcorn, activities for the kids, and a karaoke show. Jakki brought Natalie to the festival, dressed in her Dragon outfit that I bought online. She is adorable. We let her crawl around freely before the masses showed up, and everyone formed a semi circle around her, watching her act out and play monster on the floor. I made a castle out of toilet paper rolls and let her destroy them at will. It was a fun event. We left when they warmed up the microphones for the singing, a perfect cue to disappear as it was going to be loud and obnoxious.

Natalie was not shy at all. She is really confident and outgoing when Jakki and I are both with her. She knows we are watching, and she knows when one of us goes out to the truck to put quarters in the meter. She watches the door for us, and makes sure that she can see one of us when the other is away. She is aware, and that is good.

Chico was a great trip last weekend, and this weekend is the RTD Charity Golf Tournament and Halloween, so the fun continues!

~ Nathan

The Cutest Knit Hat Ever

October 22, 2010

Oh no! I missed a week. Did anybody notice? Probably not. The last two weeks have been pretty busy for me at work, so I didn’t take many breaks to write things out. I guess that means that I really didn’t have anything to complain about, or worry about, so that is good.

Natalie is cruising along. Her teeth are not breaking through yet, but I did notice that her gums are lighter in color at the top, so hopefully they break through in a couple of weeks.

Last weekend was a whirlwind. We went to San Francisco to cheer on Jakki’s family on the Nike Women’s Marathon. Natalie’s grandma Carol, great aunt Sue, and cousin (aunt) Nikkole all participated, while Jakki and cousin (aunt) Cara and I tried to help and watch. I had a really up and down weekend with many high’s and many low's. It was truly a crazy weekend.

First, I packed a light sweater and a heavy fleece sweater, figuring that this would be enough, as it had not rained in 6 months and the weather forecast was cloudy but comfortable. Liars. It rained on us for most of Sunday, which would not have been too bad if I had my fleece. Jakki thought my fleece needed an espresso bath and, in an admittedly horrible accident, she spilled a wonderful mocha all over it on Saturday. Needless to say I froze my wet butt off on Sunday.

To add to the mix on Sunday, I tried to read a marathon map made by a bunch of marketing majors at Nike and their BS information packet helped me get lost. It is interesting, I can read a detailed topographical map and know exactly where I am on any given trail, but I can’t decipher a map made for the city folk. No cross streets, no details, no landmarks. How was I supposed to know there were two different routes with one end? I was so mad. I mean “find a hapless punk to pick a fight with me so I can punch the snot out of him” mad. Jakki and Cara and Natalie were able to cheer on Carol, but we missed Sue and Nikki. We also missed the finish. I ruined the day because I couldn’t read an oversimplified map. Enough with the map. I need to get over it, but it still stings (a week later).

Natalie was a trooper last weekend. She slept surprisingly well in her Pack and Play in the hotel room in San Francisco. She was not fussy. She walked all over San Francisco in her front carrier (Baby Bjorn?) as well as her stroller (I think we logged in a half marathon ourselves just walking around *lost*). She was never really fearful of the crowds of people, and when she was she tucked into our shoulders. As long as Jakki or I had her, she just looked around and wondered what the fuss was all about. It was awesome. I was so proud of her.

After walking for the morning on Saturday, Jakki and I needed a cab back to the hotel. As we walked along, we came across this lady making knit hats with cat and bear like smiley faces on them. Jakki put a brown bear one on Natalie and it was like we stopped pedestrian traffic in the area, and everyone collectively went “aww, how cute”. It was over. We shelled out $12 for the cutest knit hat ever. She wore it for most of the rest of the trip, stopping people as we passed. It was fun.

This weekend we are heading up to Chico to visit Jenna and her baby Corinne. Corinne just turned one last week, and Natalie turns one in three weeks, so they are about a month apart. We will probably make them cupcakes and watch them make messes of themselves. It should be a good weekend, but I really need a day to relax. Maybe I can get one next month?

~ Nathan

Explorer or Demolitions Expert?

October 08, 2010

This week was full of school and conferences for me, so I have not had too many opportunities to come home and focus. I just crash on the floor and play with Natalie for awhile before we send her to bed. On top of that, Jakki’s Aunt Sue visited the ranch this week and stayed with us for a couple of nights, causing a slight tremor in the “schedule”. Aunt Sue was relatively helpful and it was fun to see how other moms play with kids. We enjoyed her visit.

On Wednesday night something odd happened. I was sitting on the floor with Jakki beside me, and Natalie crawled between us and sat down. I looked at Natalie and Jakki and back to Natalie and realized that Natalie is huge. It’s like she gained 2lbs in the last two days, and her upper body strength is starting to show on her body. She is starting to pull herself up and climb, which is fun yet frustrating when you realize that you are a path to someplace else. Natalie is a little bulldozer, expecting everything to move as she drills forward. Fearless and stubborn. She is working towards hurting herself, but that’s the only way she will ever learn, right?

I am happy that she is becoming more curious about the things around her. She is starting to pay attention to things that we use every day: the remote, the laptop, books, glasses, shoes, etc. She wants to see what’s on the other side of the fence. She wants to know what else is going on that she can’t see. Natalie wants to explore and learn.

Natalie is going to be either an explorer or a demolitions expert, I can’t decide. Either way, she will have fun doing it.

~ Nathan